*Note: I really wanted to use the whole Billy Mays tv sales thing as the theme for this post. But I thought that it would be in poor taste to jab fun at a man who is dead (I’m hoping this did not come as a shock to you but if it did then my bad.) So please read and enjoy and maybe one day it’ll be time to use Billy Mays as a theme.*

It has been entirely too long for this blogger to be absent from his site. I could give you them lame reasons for why but you don’t really care so lets just cut to the good news!

Since it’s been months, I have had much to think on and reflect over what has been happening. I have three amazing revelations that I would love to share with you reading out there!

So without further ado!

Amazing revelations in Josh’s life(or as it will be know from henceforth ARJL!)

ARJL1: Never judge a co-worker.

Some of you know that I have a partner at work who I have talked much about since starting this job, and you will have noticed that I may have been a tad harsh. I will admit that I was a jerk. This man is hard to get along with, and because of his many eccentricities I found myself losing my temper quite quickly. But recently I have been reading Psalm 118 before I go to work, and have been praying that God would use me to work in peoples lives to better them. Just using this simple prayer, my partner and I have been getting along to a point where we can joke and talk all day! He didn’t change. I just learned to be patient with this man and God has gifted me with a good co worker!

ARJL2: Rest

Literally and spiritually. I have issues sleeping most nights and a great number of insecurities and hang-ups that plague my waking and sleeping hours. Nothing new to those of you who have read my blog (I refer you to the post “Confession Time”), but I shall refer you to Psalm 118 yet again, more specifically verses 6-9. Typing it took too long and I couldn’t get a link to work so just go read it for yourself. (Nice aren’t I?) These few verses are my life now. Relying on myself or others for advice and comfort just brings more stress and insomnia, but when I rest in God and his power then I can find peace knowing that he has it all under control. Plus I can sleep better too! Sweet deal if I say so myself.

ARJL3: Just do it (sorry Nike)

Perhaps the most humbling revelation I have had recently would be this one. I have an annoying habit of saying the following words, “One of these days I’ll…”, or, “I’m going to…”. Yes we all use these phrases quite liberally, but it irks me that I say it so much and nearly all of the things I say never happen. Whether it’s something trivial like the sockball (hahahaha!), or serious like being wise with my money or going back to school. These phrases usually stem for some sort of regret that I failed to complete a task or long for the courage to accomplish said task. This then results in a spiral down of depression and self-loathing that is none to pretty to see. I can see where this attitude of fear and spinelessness can lead and I wish no more of it. So I seek to remedy this at once  WITH A LIST! Yes just a humble little list of goals that shall be accomplished even if it kills me! (or perhaps if it just means stepping out of my comfort zone). With this new boldness i quote Psalm 118: 24- “This is the day the Lord has made! Lets us rejoice and be glad in it” (Hope by now you’ve noticed the theme).

Well that concludes ARJL for this time. My fingers are not used to typing this much so I’m out suckas’!!!

PEACE OUT!!!

As you astute minds out there have already guessed; I have something I’d love to get off my chest. And what better way to do it than to post it on a blog that anyone on the planet can read? This had been something that I have had in my life for years but have masked it quite well, until now that is.

I have anxiety.

Not crippling anxiety attacks or anything in that sense, but for the past several years now I have been masking a deep unease about my life and have let strongholds of fear and doubt creep into my mind. This coupled with this obsessive need to be validated by people who don’t matter have led to many sleepless nights.

Now those of you who know me may be scratching your heads at this time. I’ll admit that it seems hard to see me as being anxious, or maybe you did see it ( in that case you could have told me about it and saved me years of sleepless nights!), but it seems that I got very good at hiding and masking my fear with a fly-by-night attitude and many other unhealthy habits along the way.

How did I come to this dramatic conclusion? I really couldn’t tell you. My parents and I talked one day and they shared some concerns about this issue. I, not feeling up to taking the criticism at the time, wrote them off in a hurry. But then the next day I was crushed by it. It was oppressive doubt came swooping in and gripped my mind. My self pity moment was beat out of me by a good man, and I took steps to break down those barriers.

I read a verse in Genesis where Abraham is promised protection and power from God and i loved it (especially since my name is Abraham too…) and now that is my mantra.

So I hope this has not been to odd for all you people out there, maybe this blog is meant to be my own confessional booth….

(WARNING!!! THIS POST SHALL BE EMO!!! IF YOU DONT LIKE IT THEN FEEL FREE TO STOP READING!!!)
As I did all my laundry today I found the saddest most heart wrenching thing ever. A sock. Just one sock. It sat there by itself with its twin gone. Now it is alone and missing it’s pair. I couldn’t help feeling for a fleeting moment that I was the sock. All alone, meant for another sock to love me. Told you it was emo. But as I sat there holding my singular sock and feeling pathetic, I had an epiphany. Socks come in pairs. Yes it may seem painfully obvious and stupid to you, but to me it was a glorious ray of light shining in my heart! The sock never comes alone! It always has a pair somewhere out there and even if you can’t see it doesn’t mean it’s alone! The weight on my soul was lifted and I was able to do my laundry with a spring in my step! Happy story after all!

I have done IT!!! Yes I have have done something wonderful and life changing!(At least to myself.) Now that I have done it, I wait with baited breath to see what rare gems of literary, philosophical, and existential genius I can stumble on and share with you beautiful people out there in this wonderful world. I shall not take up anymore of your precious time any longer good people.

Until our paths cross again….

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